Browne-d Off.

Mr Smith never realised that Labour MP Des Browne had any connections with Sri Lanka. Clearly he doesn't according to the Sri Lankan Government, which means it is another purely political appointment. Mr Smith is sure the good people of Kilmarnock and Loudoun will be relieved that Des won't have to worry about heading off just yet and can continue as their Member of Parliament for a little while longer.

"Des Browne, the former Scottish Secretary, found himself at the centre of an embarrassing diplomatic spat last night after the Sri Lankan Government flatly rejected his appointment as Gordon Brown's Special Envoy to its country, claiming the move smacked of imperialism from its old colonial master." "Discussions are on-going." Bit of an understatement really.

Jobs For The Boy.

"A Scottish Government minister hit out today after a former Labour MSP became chairman of a body involved in setting up a Gaelic television service. Alasdair Morrison - who was the MSP for the Western Isles until 2007 - has been appointed as the chairman of MG ALBA."

Mr Smith thinks it is a very clear case of "Jobs for the boys" by the Scottish Secretary Des Browne MP and it makes you wonder how the appointment ever made it through the normal public appointments processes.

Shangri-La.

Courtesy of Drumlanrig, "Scottish Secretary Des Browne has got the right idea for dealing with Labour's permanent state of crisis. In his full-time job as Defence Secretary, the MP for Kilmarnock and Loudoun hopped on a plane to Singapore on Friday as all was collapsing around him, to take part in a conference based at the Shangri-la hotel. At least one of Labour's embattled Cabinet ministers has found an earthly paradise."

That's a nice trip for a man with two jobs. He's obviously building up the Air Miles in expectation of not being around as a Minister after the next General Election.

The Evangelist.

Mr Smith reads that "First Minister Alex Salmond joined His Eminence Cardinal Keith O'Brien to officially open St Matthew's Academy in North Ayrshire, completing the full set of schools in North Ayrshire named after the four evangelists - Matthew, Mark, Luke and John ... The First Minister said: "It was Matthew who recorded the instruction to teach, and that's why I think it's fitting that he lends his name to the first Catholic secondary school in North Ayrshire - completing the set of saint's schools. I hope St Matthew's Academy will teach generations of young Scots and help them to achieve their potential."

Mr Smith never knew that Alex Salmond was such a religious scholar, but he notes that the FM appears to have gotten it wrong. St Matthew's isn't North Ayrshire's "first" Catholic Secondary, it may the only one, but as it says elsewhere in the PR it was preceded by St Michael's Academy in Kilwinning which has now been demolished and who's most famous alumni is none other than Defence Secretary Des Browne MP. Mr Smith wonders what Des thinks of the whole thing?

Grapes of Wrath?

"SCOTTISH Secretary Des Browne today launches an astonishing personal attack on Alex Salmond, accusing him of living in a "parallel universe" and of abusing his position to create rifts with Westminster rather than governing the country. "

Des Browne's comments smack of nothing more than very sour grapes. Isn't what Alex Salmond is up to exactly what politics as we currently know it in this country is all about?

The Bodyguards.

From the Herald Diary, "We hear that Defence Minister, and Celtic fan Des Browne escaped briefly from the Scottish Labour Party conference at Aviemore at the weekend with the mission to discover somewhere showing the Old Firm match. Accompanied by MSP Andy Kerr (Rangers) and Glasgow City Council leader Stephen Purcell (Celtic) and seven, yes seven, protection officers, he was taken to the bar of a golf club a few miles away where the game was indeed being shown. Strangely, as the protection officers with their earpieces and official demeanour spread out around the room, two of the chaps already in the bar looked at each other and rapidly exited the room, never to be seen again."

At the weekends.

So Secretary of State for Scotland and Defence Secretary Des Browne has admitted what everyone already suspected.

"DES Browne has admitted he carries out his duties as Secretary of State for Scotland in his spare time as he attempts to fight claims he is a "part-time" Defence Secretary. His dual mandate at the Ministry of Defence and the Scotland Office has sparked anger from former military chiefs and opposition MPs, who say he needs to devote his entire time to defence matters. Although Mr Browne was in Glasgow yesterday attending a conference on regenerating the city, he made clear that defence took up most of his diary. "I would put my record on commitment and delivery up against anyone's," he said. "The amount of time that [the job of Scottish Secretary] takes comes out of what was my private life, my family's life and my constituents' time."

So much for work life balance. And what about British jobs for British workers? Mr Smith thinks that Mr Browne should give another MP a chance at Ministerial office and stand aside.

Clutching at threads.

If this really happened as described in the Herald, then Mr Smith thinks that Team Salmond need to think seriously about picking their battles more carefully. This one comes across as a bit of a joke.

"Alex Salmond complained to the Defence Secretary that basing Scottish infantry soldiers outside Scotland will undermine attempts to boost the population. The First Minister yesterday wrote to Des Browne saying it is "regrettable", as it "seems destined to lose Scotland, through marriage and other reasons, many of its young men who we would have hoped would make their long-term future after service life in Scotland". The SNP leader's concerns were dismissed by a Whitehall source as "the best demonstration we could have of somebody manufacturing a grievance"."

Browne-d off message?

It would appear that “two jobs” Des Browne MP has set his mind against more powers for the Scottish Parliament, despite the former Leader of the Scottish Labour Party, Jack McConnell supporting the idea just ten days ago along with the leaders of Scotland’s opposition parties, and despite the likely new Leader of the Scottish Labour Party, Wendy Alexander, also apparently endorsing the idea.

So, either our Des is playing to the Westminster audience of Labour MPs who don’t have a lot of patience at the best of times for their Holyrood colleagues, or he is genuinely anti the idea of reviewing the Scottish Parliament’s powers.

Given that one of the Sunday papers suggested that our Des was a part of Wendy Alexander’s unofficial leadership election campaign, Mr Smith thinks it very unlikely that the Secretary of State for Scotland would want to cause the new Leader problems on this issue and as such thinks Mr Browne is just trying to keep backbench Scottish Labour MPs at Westminster happy by distancing himself from the idea.

Where are they now?

The question was posed in today's Herald as to where some of the thirty or so MSPs who failed to be re-elected to the Scottish Parliament in May have gone.

The Herald points out that former SNP, and then Independent, MSP Campbell Martin has turned his attention to cyberspace and is running the3towns.com, an online magazine for the Ayrshire communities of Ardrossan, Saltcoats and Stevenston.

Another of his independently minded colleagues, former MSP for Strathkelvin and Bearsden, Dr Jean Turner, according to the Scotland On Sunday, has been named as the new chief executive of the Scotland Patients Association.

Mr Smith also hears that former Labour MSP for Kilmarnock and Loudoun, Margaret Jamieson, has secured herself a berth working for the new Secretary of State for Defence and Scotland, Des Browne MP.

So who said there wasn't life after the Scottish Parliament?